by Mindy Carney

We hesitated; we almost didn't go. Yes, war was impending in the Middle East. Yes, the SARS virus had spread rapidly in Hong Kong, Singapore and China's Guangdong Province. But we read the updates from the World Health Organization and the CDC and determined, because we'd not be in any of those danger zones, that the increase in risk for us was minimal; our lives and our commitment had to go on. 

This trip made the second I've taken in as many years with Half The Sky, an organization started by and made up almost entirely of parents of Chinese-American children. Their website, Halfthesky.org, contains details of their philosophy and programs and how one can participate. Last fall we traveled to Chenzhou in the Hunan Province, where we completed a Little Sisters Preschool and a Baby Sisters Infant Nurture Center. An article written for their last newsletter chronicles that fall trip and can be found in their archives.

After the fall trip, I was offered the opportunity to co-lead a work crew. After much thought, we decided that I'd travel with our oldest daughter, Jaede. The decision proved perfect, as Joerdan, our youngest, did beautifully at home with her Daddy, developing a new, deeper bond with him. I won't deny that having our family split apart during such uncertain times generated its share of anxiety, but that only spurred us on to make the very most of the two weeks we were away, filling it with experiences and accomplishing what we'd promised. Jaede not only had a wonderful time, she felt much less stress than she'd felt on our first build, not only because of the monumental emotions she'd felt then, but because as an almost-8-yr.-old, everything goes more smoothly when she has an idea what to expect. And I'm sure having me all to herself had nothing' to do with it, either. Sure.

Each build has typically been scheduled to take two weeks. As Half The Sky has grown and streamlined the process, its China employees are able to accomplish more and more prep work, making the work for the volunteer crew actually the finishing and assembly of the environment. As lumber quality standards are low in China, puttying is a big part of the first days. Lots of puttying, sanding and smoothing. Then priming and painting the rooms, the equipment and the furniture, detail and touch-up work, furniture and toy assembly, and final set up of the rooms follow. Our Chinese carpenters install the bookcases and climbers we finish, and play an integral part in making sure everything happens on time. 

What we found, out of necessity, were many timesaving ideas (don't call them short-cuts), and a complete willingness by an excellent crew to work a few extra hours. We ate lunch brought to us instead of boarding a bus and heading out for a mid-day meal, we started a bit earlier and stayed a bit later, and found ways to use our color palette that didn't take quite the amount of laborious detail work as had been invested previously. And still, at the end, the rooms looked warm and wonderful and inviting, clean and ready to be filled with music and the chatter and laughter of excited, happy children. And as we were creating the environment, the real work of training the teachers and nannies hired by Half The Sky was going on around us. They will, of course, be the backbone of the program, inspiring, loving and nurturing the children who continue to reside in China's orphanages.

For our children, these trips take on a range of meaning. Depending on their ages and their development, they gather from it what their hearts need. On the surface, my daughter describes it as like going to camp, and it is truly like a wonderful immersion camp, as they spend their time with Half The Sky's own ayis while the parents work. These lovely women keep the children busy and happy, and I know Jaede has fallen in love with both of them. Much of the attraction of this second trip for her was seeing her beloved Wei Ayi and Feng Ayi again, as well as the other members of HTS's China staff, the translators, carpenters, etc. As we venture out each day or evening, the children absorb the sights and smells of China, often turning up their noses at some of the more, shall we say, exotic fare. But they make friends wherever they go, and the language barriers never seem to be nearly as much an issue for them as they are for us grown-ups! We just feel very grateful for our expert translators - and we get a good brushing up on our pantomime and charade skills in the process. When HTS celebrates the completion of the work with a party for the children, our kids jump right in and help the little ones into dress-up clothes, they pass out treats, model silly hats, and sing and dance right along with the kids living in the institution. It is always a joy to watch.

Since our crew ended up finishing our first build in one week and moving on to do a second build in Yueyang so that Half The Sky could refrain from sending a second crew, we were treated to the bonus of seeing two cities and two different facilities. The institutions vary as to how much interaction we have with the children and babies; typically we see many of them on the first day when we are given a tour of the facilities, and after than, logistics, as well as the comfort level of the orphanage staff, will dictate how much interaction. Often the preschoolers and older children will find us, just to watch, and we get to know them over the course of the week. And it seems that on each build, someone becomes special to each of us. 

In Shaoyang, I became smitten with a little girl, about 3, who was going into the preschool - she had such a face, fine features with big eyes; even with her terrible haircut and her grubby face she was lovely. She was very solemn, but watched every move we made. She had a clubfoot, so was in the special needs group, but you could see in her eyes that she was so bright and taking in everything. Some of us decided to make it our mission upon returning home to get information on her so that we could donate and arrange corrective surgery. I, for one, was consumed with the thought that something so easily repairable would hinder her, probably severely, throughout her life. Like all the kids, she had her pockets stuffed with treats and a very sticky face by the end of the party, and had shown us a few shy, tentative smiles. On our 3rd day in Yueyang, HTS's executive director, Jenny Bowen, came to breakfast and told us that she'd just been talking to the Shaoyang director - and "our" little girl had just been referred to her forever family!!! I had goosebumps for half the day. I so wish we could find that family, and let them know that her special little spirit had reached right out to all of us. It still almost makes me cry.

When all is said and done and we prepare to part company, the emotional impact can be staggering. The being there somehow creates a bond almost as strong as I feel to my girls' first homes. We love them for the start in life they gave our children, we love that at those places, someone knew our babies before we did. But at our build sites, WE now know children there - some of them before they meet their forever families, many who will spend much of their time for the next while in the spaces we lovingly and gratefully prepared for them. To able to share such an intimate part of their lives means more than I can adequately explain here. 

The number of infants continuing to be delivered to the various institutions I've visited is staggering. I had absolutely no idea that children were still coming in at the rates they are, but I can say with conviction that the need is there, the need remains huge, and the need WILL remain for years to come. Not only for programs like ours, but those supported by FCC and by the agencies who continue to work for the betterment of care for all those little ones, left there trying to hold up their half of the sky.