| Contributed
by Cecilia Nadal
On November 18th, 2005 one of my dearest friends and teachers
passed away at the age of 83. MingZhu Mao was a tiny attractive
woman with the spiritual power and intelligence of a master yet
her carriage with everyone was one of unqualified love and humility.
Her voice was like the sweet music of a bird and her eyes always
twinkled with wonderment about life and humanity. Her courage
and belief that love "cures all things" was manifested
even in her last days of life. While in the hospital she chose
to sing songs to her family and friends and to the nurses and
doctors who attended her. Among her favorite songs were "Love's
Old Sweet Song" and "Shining in the Moonlight."
MingZhu or Ming, as most friends called her, came from China
to the United States following a successful career as a Professor
of English Literature at Nanjing University from 1950 to 1989.
As an exchange
Professor, she taught a few years at a university in North Carolina
and
eventually settled in St. Louis with her husband Dr.ZhiXun Yao
and her beloved daughter Xiaoyi Yao, son-in-law Wayne Wang and
grand-daughter Amy.
In 1999, a good friend suggested that I think about getting Chinese
reflexology from Dr. Yao and wife, Ming, for specific physical
challenges I was experiencing. Before my first appointment with
them, I instinctively knew our visit would be special. I was told
that Ming often recited from Shakespeare and had a prolific knowledge
of great English works.
I prepared for my visit by bringing delicious "moon cakes"
to demonstrate my appreciation for their help. When I met Ming
with my "moon cakes" in hand, she embraced me, held
me tight and thanked me profusely for that very small gesture.
When people passed the office they seemed intrigued by the affection
that was being shown between a diminutive Chinese woman and much
larger African American woman. And there we were, very real and
to become friends with a special relationship. That first visit
lasted about 2 ? hours largely because Ming and I talked about
music, literature, religion and more. It was almost as if old
friends were meeting again after a long absence from each other.
Ming would always translate for Dr. Yao what the ailments were
of each patient but right along with this professional role she
always extended herself demonstrating her exceptional capacity
to remember details about you, your family and your interests.
Soon Ming spoke with my father in Puerto Rico, met some of my
dearest friends and taught me how to focus on "the here and
now" thru meditation. One Saturday, I had the pleasure of
taking Ming and Dr. Yao home and while we were in the car Ming
began singing "Danny Boy", a song I happen to know.
There we were once again, the odd couple, singing an Irish song
at a stop light in Chesterfied.
Strangely, I never thought about Ming's age or the fact that
she had seamlessly started a new life in her retirement in a new
country. That thought came to me only when I heard of her death.
Most of the time I never thought of Ming and Dr. Yao as Chinese,
that only happened when others looked at us curiously. Ming was
one of those exceptional people who transcended color and race
and allowed you to know her soul and helped you to examine your
own. Many friends and family will miss MingZhu but we all are
so blessed to have crossed her path in our lifetime. I hope that
I will continue singing songs that fill the soul, no matter where
they come from with those who come from other cultures. Most of
all, I pray that I will be able to sing to those I love when it
is time to leave this earth. Ming was an extraordinary woman who
left us an extraordinary legacy -- to love unequivocally, to reach
out and always sing. I salute you dear sister!
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